I have never thought myself a feminist, especially the feminist of the social media that would fight tooth and nail for gender equality in public and then go home to kneel before a man to beg for ‘urgent 2k’. I very well believe the man to be the head and the woman the neck. Both ought to work hand in hand for their own betterment.
Being female should be a blessing not a curse right? RIGHT? There ought to be more than just being a vessel to which life is brought to earth? Right? There ought to be more to bleeding once a month while writhing in pain. There just has to be more!!!
I grew up hearing the society say ‘women should be respected’ ‘you shouldn’t hit a woman’ ‘you should treat her as an egg’. But deep down do they really mean it? From time immemorial, right from when the female child is born, she is taught to take care of people around her. She is taught to nurture, to be submissive, to speak when spoken to, not to speak too loud so not to anger ‘her husband’ to massage the man’s ego…She is constantly reminded that she would end up in a man’s house…She isn’t taught to speak up and out, she is taught to be secretive and as painful as it sounds, hide whatever pain or hurt she may feel so she wouldn’t be judged by the society. (Reminds me of a friend that almost got raped by a supposed suitor when she had gone to pick up the food flask used to give him food on Christmas Day. She said she had gone home feeling cold and had gone to confide in her mother. Expecting her mother to offer sympathy, she told her it was her fault she almost got raped and went further to send her back to the same person to pick up the food flask or not come back…For the rest of that day, I looked at my mum funny, wondering if she would do same to me if found in that situation) I bet you have seen Nollywood movies where a female is being maltreated by her husband and her parents force her to remain there and sometimes she eventually dies.
The boy child on the other hand is left to do as he pleases. A lot of boys out there only learnt to cook and do chores from their days in university. Some till date see chores as a feminine thing and wouldn’t want to be seen being feminine. A lot of them end up being Selfish, arrogant, entitled and full of pride. And in the end, you hear them say; ‘na woman go marry this one oh!’ Or ‘His wife is a strong woman’. There just has to be more!!!!!
Which reminds me of an occurrence; I had been ill for weeks and had just been discharged and brought home. That evening, my younger brother demanded a particular meal and I offered to make it. He drove off and about thirty minutes later, he called asking if it was ready and I told him I was on it. He came home and met me in the kitchen and all hell was let loose! He screamed and told me of my incompetence and how he would have gone out to buy same food. For few minutes I stood with my mouth open hoping and praying my mother would at least shun him and remind him I was his senior…whoosai! When I took it upon myself to defend myself and remind him of our three year age difference, my mother suddenly found her voice and said ‘yu wàni hurry up! Cant you see he is hungry? Is this how you’d treat your husband when you eventually get married?’ Wow! Just wow!!!. He eventually didn’t eat the food and I thought ‘if this is what getting married would feel like, maybe I’d remain single’
There definitely has to be more to being female.